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Clifford the Big Red Dog Needs Your Vote (now I wish I had an Uncle Sam poster with his face super imposed on it)

July 28, 2009



Clifford is our big red dog (we didn’t name him) who we adopted from a New Leash on Life (great group). He’s super sweet and loving, and as I’ve mentioned before-not the brightest dog. When J is out of town, he pees in the house out of anxiety-I could go away permanently and he’d probably just be happy to have J all to himself. He peed in the house out of exuberance when I put up our (fake) Christmas tree and he finally, so he believed, got the inside bathroom he always wanted. Seriously, if it’s raining he won’t go out to pee. I’ve even tried following him around with a very large umbrella. No dice. They think he was taken away from an owner who was a nut job and not very nice to him. When we first got him, he still didn’t really know his name (at 2) and wasn’t even sure about toys. Now he loves them. Except for bones. He can’t figure out how to chew them up and can only indulge when my sister’s dog Lady (#94 in the contest) pulls them apart and allows him to have the smaller bits. Of course Lady, who is a bit of a tramp and always trying to make out with/shove her tongue in Clifford’s mouth, only provides this service as a ploy to gain his affection. Whatever works.

Clifford also enjoys trying to jump into J’s truck bed when the tailgate is up and dragging around 9 foot long tree limbs and whacking folks in the legs with them. Laser pointers are a huge hit as well, he will try to scale a wall for that little red dot. But he is afraid of plastic birthday lawn ornaments. One of our neighbors had 50 plastic crows in their yard and he was rendered motionless by his fear. In those cases, or when he is sad bratchild likes to lock him in her room and read him stories. And yes, this is also the same dog that got lost under our back porch in an attempt to go on a mass killing spree of all chipmunks. There is an access hatch to get to the hose and stuff under our porch and Clifford hopped down it and then couldn’t get out due to lattice all around the bottom. Nor could he find the hatch to come back up. Sigh. Have I mentionned he’s really sweet?

Anyhoo, the point of all this, is that the above photo is Clifford’s entry in the Greater Huntsville Humane Society’s Hot Dogs/Cool Cats contest (hooray for me for finally figuring out how to include photos! I can’t imagine how the upload/insert followed by a little picture shape didn’t clue me in earlier). Currently he is in 40th place, which I am cool with. The top 80 or so have a place in the calendar. So please, if you are so inclined and local, drop by Parkway Place Mall and vote for Clifford (#95). It’s $1/vote and the proceeds go to the shelter. The dog in first place has $600 some in votes and I am convinced their owners just dropped a big hunk o’ cash in a shameless attempt to “buy” the cover so it is actually not a representation of the popular vote (if I were in a position to put down a large sum of cash, this process would of course be fair and fabulous and for the good of the animals but since I can’t, it’s not).

My reasonable and nice (yes it gets old) hubby has been skeptical about this from the very beginning due to my tendency to be compulsive and fixated. He asked if I was going to be competitive, obsessed, unreasonable and fanatical (also good words to describe my typical behavior) about this endeavor. He was also curious how much exactly this crusade was going to cost him as we “bought” 15 votes when we signed him up and bratchild and I droppped by the other day and put another $25 down on him.

I informed him that I was considering bratchild and I working a shift at the voting place which he labeled, not my best idea ever. Apparently, my sweet hubby has no faith that bratchild or I could refrain from flagging down innocent passerbys and persuading them to vote for Clifford. Also, a concern? That we would unmercifully heckle the folks that actually did want to participate until they put their votes in for Clifford, threw money at us, or ran away screaming (hopefully after throwing money at us in which case I am okay with all of the above options). In a nutshell, he was convinced our volunteerism would lead to some sort of incident, probably involving mall security and angry bystanders. So in the interest of public safety and decorum, I have taken my quest for votes to the internet. Even if you don’t vote for Clifford (and really, why wouldn’t you?) please get out and vote and support the Humane Society. You can support them again by purchasing a calendar when it is published.

(Seriously folks, if you can please go donate a few dollars. Our humane society is a no kill shelter and can use all the support it can get. Think you can vote at Parkway Place thru August 7th? Maybe 9th.)

Also, J fears that Clifford will feel like a loser if he doesn’t get a place and that his fragile ego simply can’t handle that. Clifford, not J-at least I think he was talking about Clifford’s ego?

© Amy Lloyd Mayfield and Amy’s Blam, 2009. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Amy Lloyd Mayfield and Amy’s Blam with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
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