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Friday Flip-Offs 7/9 Plus, some news!

July 9, 2010

It’s that time of the week again, Friday flip-offs. This week seems to center on body/cosmetic things. It’s so nice that annoyances like to band together in an effort to drive me insane. Thanks to Gigi at Kludgy Mom for the idea, it really is fun.

Vibrating mascara-this was obviously invented by either a man or someone exceptionally more coordinated than I am. And? This is pretty much the worst idea on the planet. Like I need any assistance poking myself in the eye? I can do that on my own without the aid of battery-powered mascara. And if I’m not too lazy to wiggle the mascara at the base of my lashes-no one else should be.

A certain pair of Dolce & Gabbana aviator sunglasses-you are the one pair that actually manages to stay on my head so I would appreciate it if you could keep your nose pieces from getting tangled in my hair. I had to cut you out. For the second time.

I’d also like to flip off  boobs. No, really, my actual breasts-not boobs in the world. You get in the way of the way large fancy guns. Also? Don’t google boobs to make sure it does in fact mean “a person of simplistic nature, an oaf,” unless you enjoy boob porn. The breast kind,  not the idiot person kind-which ewww…I’m stopping now.

F-you Thursday. You sucked. Hard. Yesterday I had a crap day. The outcome was good-I got some super exciting news and was also reminded how lucky I am to now have awesome, genuine friends. But the part leading up to it? Sucktastic. So much to the point that when I went to get my hair trimmed-I got it whacked. Like 4 inches whacked. I should know better than to get my hair cut while I am in a foul mood. It looks good but I’d been working forever on growing my hair out after my former hairdresser gave me a “style” that was a cross between Joan Jett in the 80’s/Carol Brady/a mullet. It was not cute.

On that note, a ginormous super-sized middle finger to idiots. Just because someone talks the loudest-doesn’t mean they’re right. Often they’re trying to convince you, or themselves, that they don’t suck.

I also have a few technical flips this week…

WordPress. I love you. I love you almost as much as my shoe collection but really? You have me torn. Part of me wants to self-host, take our relationship to the next level. Part of me is happy how we are. But I wish you would let me use plugins, like comment luv. I also wish you would allow ads. I mean, I don’t even know if I want ads, but it would be nice to have the option. I would also lose my stats and, I think, my askimet spam stuff which rocks. Are there other stats sites I can use? Anyone have experience with self-hosting and using wordpress? Would I have to change the look at all? Holp!

Comment luv-I like you in theory but you are always about 3 posts behind on me. Keep up! I’ll have posted 3 blogs since Friday Flip-offs and that’s still the one you choose to share with the world. I also think you censor me and won’t post titles with bad words. We may be breaking up…but I still want you on my blog. We may need therapy.

And a random middle finger goes to…

Nicolas Cage, I’m going to go ahead and add you to my list. Every time I watch one of your movies you give me panic attacks about the end of the world or convicts on airplanes. I am still dealing with a horrific fear of solar flares, which my hubs tells me isn’t entirely unjustified. Tonight we are taking bratchild to see “The Sorcerer’s Apprentice.” I am telling myself you won’t be able to emotionally scar me with this movie, please don’t prove me wrong.

Drum roll please…I have a crazy exciting announcement. I am going to be the fourth “lady” on the Lady Bloggers Society. You can read about it here. If you’re stopping by from there-a big old welcome and I look forward to getting to know you! Not a member? Go join! It’s free and you get all kinds of awesome advice. I personally have learned TONS from them and you get to network with lots and lots, I mean lots, of other awesome bloggers. Plus, we’re having a conference in Vegas in November and I KNOW you all want to come.

Other than that? Please keep clicking the juggling mom periodically and don’t forget to vote for Southern Fried Snark under Guiltiest Pleasure in the BlogLuxe awards. Only 3 more days!

What are you flipping off this week? More importantly, who’s coming to Blogher? The countdown is on!

© Amy Lloyd Mayfield and Amy’s Blam, 2010. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Amy Lloyd Mayfield and Amy’s Blam with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

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28 Comments leave one →
  1. July 9, 2010 11:04 AM

    YAY!
    I am super excited to getting to know you!
    You sound like a blast to get to know. I am visiting from the Lady Blogger’s society…

    I have the same beef with Comment luv, they are always behind for me too..:(
    You are going to Blogher?
    That sounds like a BLAST!
    I will go someday too, this year is NOT the year though!
    I will go though.

    Hope you have a wonderful day and Congrats on the 4th lady blogger position!!

  2. July 9, 2010 11:06 AM

    vibrating mascara. hahahaha, yeah, I’m with you. I can poke myself in my eye. Loved them!!!

  3. July 9, 2010 12:12 PM

    Vibrating mascara? What? I had no idea that even existed!

    CONGRATULATIONS on being the 4th Lady Blogger! I l.o.v.e. that community… so much help and so much support!

  4. July 9, 2010 12:51 PM

    RE: Self hosting.
    DO EEEEEET. The plug ins are wonderful. And I can totally help you if you need.

    RE: Vibrating mascara.
    Seriously what the eff is up with that stuff? Why does mascara need to vibrate? I can envision myself stabbing myself repeatedly in the eyeball with it.

  5. July 9, 2010 1:24 PM

    Congratulations on becoming the newest Lady Blogger! I loved your post today. You are a very funny lady. I am looking forward to reading your posts regularly. In honor of your Friday Flip Off post, I’d like to flip off every single thing I’ve ever bought from an infomercial. It’s crap!

  6. July 9, 2010 2:29 PM

    well sweetbabyjesus, that was jam packed with fun. i flipped off my boobs so many times, i finally had them reduced. i am in love with my high & tight lil b’s. Hello over share.
    congrats on the new ‘lady’ gig!

  7. July 9, 2010 3:31 PM

    I’m so jealous that you are going to BlogHer. Next year I’m determined to coincide my trip to the States with BlogHer…sad I know!!!

    Vibrating mascara…..ewwwww……don’t fancy that at all!!!

    Amazing that you are going to be the 4th Lady Blogger!!! Go Amy!

  8. July 9, 2010 4:18 PM

    I’m self-hosted on WP and Askimet came with my blog so I assume you wouldn’t lose that. I don’t have ads at this point but I don’t think it would be a problem. About followers … I don’t know but my experience indicates that the ones that are really following will follow you through the move. Good luck!

    And congrats on LBS! That is so cool!

  9. July 10, 2010 3:54 AM

    Vibrating mascara? Why? Isn’t it the same effect if you just shake your hand… 🙂
    I’m changing to wp in a week or two – still a lot to do little details before ready to publish it…
    Happy Saturday from Casablanca!

  10. July 10, 2010 10:28 AM

    Vibrating mascara is the worst idea ever! I can’t get that shit on with a steady hand.

    Also, Nicholas cage, uggghhh. Have you seen Face Off? That made me hate him AND John Travolta. Scientology helped with John Travolta, but still.

    Visiting from the Tea Patry.

    Michelle
    http://pietrosmomma.blogspot.com/

  11. July 10, 2010 12:07 PM

    So true on the vibrating mascara thing. Who the hell wants something to vibrate by their eye? No thanks!

    I would like to add in a late entry for Flip off Friday! Underwear elastics. Yes – I said it. F-u underwear elastics – no matter what size I get the skivvies always fit but the elastic cuts in and creates some weird bulge on my sides.

    Ok – I feel better! I found you from the LBS Tea Party!

  12. July 10, 2010 12:19 PM

    I wish I could offer some kind of helpful advice re: self-hosting vs. WordPress, but I’m in the dark with that stuff, too. I wish you the best of luck though and hope you get that commentluv stuff straightened out.

    You crack me the hell up. What’s up with vibrating mascara and why the need? I foresee a lot of trips to the ER because of some asshat’s new invention.

    Also, congrats on being the newest Lady Blogger 🙂 That is awesome news!!!

  13. July 10, 2010 12:21 PM

    And yes, stopping by from the Tea Party 🙂

  14. July 10, 2010 12:36 PM

    Hmmm….who am I flipping off this week?? Asshole bubbas who drive big pickup trucks! I’m so tired of these testosterone idiots who try and scare my mini cooper off the highway! These dorks love to pull RIGHT behind me on the interstate, tailing me with a mere 3 inches of clearance. Then, they love to glare down at me as they whiz by…polluting the environment with giant exhaust clouds. On top of it…most of the time…these drivers aren’t even wearing seatbelts! My poor mini can move fast, but she prefers to stay away from the redneck ways. LOL.

    Congrats on your news!

  15. July 10, 2010 1:35 PM

    Oh no – this looks like dangerous fun! I have to flip off poison ivy. My poor teen has it all over his body, including on his “junk” (his word, not mine). So imagine my own google search today for what he could safely use down there!

    And the tech stuff – I hear ya about comment luv being behind. And on some blogs that have it, for some reason it ignores me. Hmm.

    WP.com vs. org is a tough one. I made the change a couple of months ago and really regretted it for a while through all the growing pains. I am starting a new blog on .com that may or may not happen but already I see they have made several improvements. Whichever, I love your design:)

  16. July 10, 2010 4:21 PM

    Oh my goodness gracious alive & stuff there (my older family members talk this way), this was cracking me up! Sooo glad you found my silly blog & joined it right away, especially since you are the 4th lady blogger and all. 🙂

  17. July 10, 2010 4:57 PM

    Who knew they even had vibrating mascara? Haha. Love the boobs one. Great flips girl. Congrats on the lady bloggers thing.

  18. July 10, 2010 9:39 PM

    I cannot even remember the last time I wore mascara, and I certainly was not aware that it vibrated nowadays. That is just beyond stupid.

    No conferences or conventions for me. Why do all you people want to actually meet one another in real life? I do not get that. At all.

    I am sure you are lovely, but I have enough people in my real life.

    Anyway, I will flip-off the relatives who promised to give me a few hours notice of their arrival this afternoon. 15 minutes? Is not a few hours.

    Just saying.

  19. July 11, 2010 3:37 AM

    This is the best flips! Love the mascara thing hahaha. I just moved to self host with the help of a friend who’s been so helpful or else I’d be so lost. Good luck with it, I hope WP will get better for you.

  20. July 11, 2010 11:00 AM

    I never could understand why someone would want to stick a vibrating wand anywhere near their eyes!! I can barely put on regular mascara without poking myself…wouldn’t even consider the vibrating kind!

    I’m thinking about switching to WP but am scared…

    Congrats on becoming the 4th Lady Blogger!!

  21. amyblam permalink*
    July 11, 2010 5:50 PM

    Well, I’ve always been using wordpress.com and have my own domain. Now I am considering a switch to self-hosting so I can use plug-ins and possible have ads-should I decide I want to.
    Trying to figure out how big of a hassle and if it will change/make me lose anything.

  22. July 12, 2010 9:06 AM

    Yes, WP will be a hassle, yes, you will lose a ton of followers. But you have a strong enough following that you will build it back up quickly, esp. being part of LBS now. If you need help with any of it..lemme know. I survived. 🙂

    Hate, HATE, HATE when my glasses get stuck in my hair. WTF?

    did you actually try the vibrating mascara?

  23. July 12, 2010 10:40 AM

    So glad to have you on board at LBS!

    The comment luv thing drives me crazy too! I’m thinking you won’t have too much of a problem with the switch to self hosting since you are not on blogger. I recently went from blogger to self hosting and will admit it was sort of a pain! Survived though.

    Vibrating mascara????

  24. July 12, 2010 4:55 PM

    Oh Amy Girl, that is just the most wonderful news! Congratulations! I’m a member over there, so I look forward to seeing you there, too.

    I just got back from vacation and I’m wandering through blogland checking on everyone. You, so far, had the best week of all.

    And here’s why I’d flip off Nick Cage. His hair and his sell out as an actor. Why Nick? Why plugs? Grow old gracefully. And the movies these days. Ugh. Go back to the brilliance of Raising Arizona and When Peggy Sue Got Married, please.

    • amyblam permalink*
      July 12, 2010 9:37 PM

      Oh good-I’ll get to see you all kinds of places.
      Oh how I love Peggy Sue Got Married…

  25. July 12, 2010 11:22 PM

    I have been away so just now catching up on old posts. Congratulations on being the 4th blogger. You’ll do a fantastic job!

    Also, I can’t think of a single reason for mascara to vibrate. I mean, I can think of ONE reason, but surely not. Right?

  26. July 13, 2010 11:37 PM

    I would like to flip off bridesmaid dresses and the process of finding a bridesmaid dress. I have spent the past 48 hours straight shopping with 4 other opinionated women for the perfect dress to wear to my cousins wedding…. I end up paying $150 for an alright dress only to try on one 3 hours later in my home town and fall in love with it…. and here’s the kicker, it’s $50 less.

  27. amyblam permalink*
    July 14, 2010 8:27 PM

    Thank you guys for all the well-wishes and Gigi and Salt for offers of help with wordpress self-hosting! I’m trying to make my way to all the fun new sites above!

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