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All about the booty

September 13, 2010

When we were in NYC for BlogHer I tasted the wonder that is Pirate’s Booty aged white cheddar. Sadly, I could not remember the booth we got it from. Otherwise, I would have made repeated trips and hounded them for more.

Since we returned I have been on the hunt for it. It wasn’t available in Auburn or New Orleans. Sigh.

When I searched their website, they said the closest place that stocked it was 90 miles away in Hoover. Bother.

BUT Friday night as J and I were on our way to pick up dinner from Ding How II, otherwise known as the only Chinese in town that I like, I had a brain spark that perhaps Fresh Market carried it and the website was wrong. Fresh Market has all kinds of overpriced good for you crap.

Because I had on exceptionally high heels and didn’t want to endure any unneccessary walking, I called them from the parking lot. This was the exchange:

Peppy Fresh Market employee: “Thank you for calling Fresh Market.”

Me: “Do you have Pirate’s Booty?’

PFME: “What?”

(J is laughing uncontrollably causing me to snicker and talk like a 12-year-old girl making prank phone calls. Ahem. Not that I would know.)

Me: (laughing) “Pirate’s Booty. The snack?”

PFME: “You mean Robert’s American?”

Me: “Okay. That might be the parent company.”


As we hung up, I give J a really? and tell him we have to go inside Fresh Market. While I scour the store and he says things like, you can’t find the booty? No booty for you tonight and the like.

Upon discovering they only had one bag, I was despondent. J chided me into asking the clerk if they had anymore in the back by exclaiming, rather loudly, that I must not REALLY want the booty must not really love booty.

Shamed, and scared what else he could come up with that was mildly embarrassing and related to pirate’s and/or booty, I asked the clerk this: “Do you have any extra booty in that back?” (I WAS gesturing with the one precious bag in my hand.)

He brought out three bags and stingily tried to give me only one, I wanted ALL the booty.

When we went to check out, of course, J was still FULL of the booty jokes. Somehow the clerks asked if we wanted to open the bag and try it before we bought it. (Had I known that was an option I would have gone willy-nilly through the store trying everything.) J said: “Oh no, she’s had the booty lots and she is all about it. Has to have it.”

Awesome. And yes, the two little girls giggled and batted their lashes at J and his hilarity.

(At some point in time it also came up that he would rather be gay than sleep with “that mule,” meaning Sarah Jessica Parker. Good to know. I’ll warn SJP if I ever see her and she ever hits on J that it’s not going to go well for her.)

Reminder: PLEASE vote for me whenever you stop by. Just click the little juggling lady and then click to vote on the next screen. Also, like me on facebook. I’ll be giving away a $100 Amazon gift card when I reach 500 likers and if someone you refer wins, you get a $50 one.

© Amy Lloyd Mayfield and Amy’s Blam, 2010. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Amy Lloyd Mayfield and Amy’s Blam with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

13 Comments leave one →
  1. September 13, 2010 6:55 AM

    LMAO!pirates booty!! you’re making me wanna call around and look for some just to ask for it!!!
    thanks for visiting my blog!!

  2. September 13, 2010 8:21 AM

    God, I wish I had been in the store during all that.

  3. Allison C. permalink
    September 13, 2010 9:11 AM

    In the event Fresh Market experiences a shortage, Earth Fare carries it as well.

  4. September 13, 2010 9:24 AM

    I love me some booty! Trader Joe’s sells it in my neck of the woods.

  5. September 13, 2010 10:41 AM

    My sister turned me on to the booty. She buys it for her little girls. That stuff is crack, man. Here’s what I’ve discovered, I can find it in most grocery stores in the organic aisle. Also, we have Publix, the best grocery store in the world, down here and even though they already carry it, they have a policy in their store, If you want something they don’t carry, just say the word and they’ll start ordering it. Might want to look into your local grocery store and see if they have the same policy.

    Going to vote.

  6. September 13, 2010 11:10 AM

    All this trouble just to get a little booty? I have been obssessing over the booty for years. Give me your addy and I will send you some more booty via USPS.

    Is that even legal?

    I’m off to like you on FB.

  7. September 13, 2010 1:03 PM

    I just heard that Trader Joe’s has their own version of it. I also have seen it at Safeway and Giant….they sell it in individual packages. It might be in the organic food aisle also. Good luck with gettin’ some booty!

  8. September 13, 2010 2:04 PM

    Pirate’s Booty is AWESOME!!

  9. September 14, 2010 8:19 PM

    I’ve been snorting about this since it popped into my inbox. Can just picture you in the store. For Real! Our Whole Paycheck carries the Booty. Also? My local Shaws!! In the earthy/crunchy section. HUGE bags. Loooove me some bootay.

  10. September 14, 2010 11:16 PM

    I looooove pirate’s boooooty. Have you ever tried the caramel booty? It might be my favorite snack ever, and I’m pretty sure that Trader Joe’s carries it (as someone above stated). Or perhaps a local Whole Foods? Glad you were able to pirate some booty :p

  11. Little Miss S permalink
    September 15, 2010 4:49 AM

    Pirate’s Booty is like crack for snackers….it is THAT good! I will go in for a handful and then 10 minutes later, the bag is half gone and I have white crumbs all over my face. Our Costco (oh how I love thee) sells a gargantuan 2-bag-pack of the Booty…I could probably hook you up.

  12. September 15, 2010 6:49 PM

    Pirate’s booty cheddar… mmm, getting hungry, gotta find some of that!

  13. September 18, 2010 2:25 PM

    Pirate’s Booty rocks! I would have called around to every store to find it too. Luckily for me, every store around here sells it.

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